Thesis on "Dating Before and After the Internet"

Thesis 20 pages (6545 words) Sources: 10 Style: APA

[EXCERPT] . . . .

Online Dating

Collecting

There are two sides to every coin, and likewise, synonymous to a coin with two sides, online dating has its pros and cons. The question therefore, which weigh more, the advantages or the disadvantages. Let us probe deeper. Today's fast paced lifestyle, where career has taken its toil, has left millions of people single; but with the emergence of online dating, where convenience is the name of the game. Before now, the quest to find love has never was never been this easy until now. Imagine, happiness, fun, excitement; all mixed up with blended with the fact that you are having to invest very little, so little investment, both emotionally and financially. With a vast array of profiles to choose from all around the globe, patterned to your specific criteria of compatibility, most dating web sites make it where a person can do all of these while in the comfort of their home, regardless of time, how they look, what they wear, and how much money they are willing to sacrifice. Indeed, the online dating appears to present the best of both worlds. "Online dating has shed its stigma as matchmaker for the awkward (Goodwin 1990) to claim a new prominence in the social lives of millions of users. In August 2003 alone, 40 million unique users visited online dating sites in the United States alone, according to U.S. News & World Report -- that's about half the number of single adults in the U.S. Given their prevalence, it seems likely that online dating systems have begun to influence not only individual lives but also cultural notions of love and attraction with their overflowing catalogues of potential partners and their sometimes idiosyncratic choices of personal characteristics to highlight. But despite the incredible number of people using these services, we know little about how users perceive each other and interact through these mediated channels, or how such technologies might affect their selection of partners for dating, sex, and marriage "(Online dating research at Berkeley). From there, in today's fast paced hectic world single people are using the Internet to meet people. Many factors of the online dating phenomenon influence the chance of these "meetings" actually becoming a successful or non-successful relationship.

The internet

Internet companies place advertisements on the web to draw people in. It provides a way for people to be deceptive by completing a profile, which contains information about the prospect. The information that is included in the profile is not always true; it is possible that the profile is of a dirty old man or a very smart teen. Online dating is, in essence, based on one-dimensional, information on a flat computer screen whereas people are multi-faceted (Baker, a.J., 2005).

Since the Internet has become popular and a way to access information, including free music, it has hinder the music industry because people are not buying as much, considering their free access. The impact of the Internet is very damaging to some industries that they see the copyright laws to be very important. Until the Internet, when coping other people's material for personal use, it was considered legal because it was not for selling purposes. However, due to the Internet, the legal system has decided there are restrictions to that law. This is due to the fact that people were accessing other people's material from a third party, which was clearly violating copyright laws. However, the internet has increased and changed the expectations of subcultures, which have been around for thirty years. Furthermore, it has given people a place to find common ground with their music and style that is an expression of their emotions even it is not about who they are From there, when conducting interview it is clear that MySpace has become a social networking place where 'youths can be themselves even escape reality.

With that, mySpace gives subcultures a chance to grow into a bigger aspect of youths lives. This is because music is the only way to get through to people at times due to the fact it hits them in the soul and their spirituality. Social networking web sites make that opportunity for music more possible due to the fact that millions of people access the internet everyday.

Another reason MySpace is so popular is that it gives you the freedom to express yourself without the limitations of other social networking sites, like Friendster, where there seems to be a focus on keeping things under control and nice, and users can't customize their profiles quite to the same degree as they can on MySpace. MySpace has tapped into the alternative music scene, and so has attracted a hip, young crowd with profiles that are edgier and more diverse. A quick browse of MySpace profiles demonstrates that users really are free to express themselves however they please. You'll come across everyone from musicians, to bikers, to Goths, to pagans, to plain old computer nerds, and of course everyone in between. You'll also notice that some people seem quite uninhibited online. For example, you'll find pictures of people showing off their tattoos -- as you can see in Figure 1-2.With MySpace becoming a part of the News Limited media empire, the new management has made a push to clean things up, although of course MySpace is still relatively "cool." ("MySpace").

Furthermore, through research, it has been discovered most ethnic groups that live in the United States consist of young people, which means by staying in this country, they grow accustom to their surroundings. Once they have grown accustom to living here, they feel like this is their home to start a life with their own families. This continues the growing number of ethnic groups in this country. From there, the internet is where different areas of youth cultural resistance are apparent in community. The online production is evident and in the same virtual space, which culture operated by power groups associated with the Internet exists that encourages subcultures to grow. An important ethnographic approach is vital in sensitizing scholars to this broader context that youth groups. There is struggle in relation to notions of hegemony and ideology described earlier, which leads to the questions about if youth cultural resistance are actually effectively challenging power groups ("Music Education Research"). Therefore, there has been research conducted that there only a few groups of people that can handle the different types of messages that are written on the internet. This brings subcultures together with their common interests.

Underlying research on topics such as these is a commitment to understand 'whose knowledge counts' and understanding the Internet as a space where battles between different message producers and knowledge claims play out. This sort of research contributes to a body of work in education focused around the diffusion of knowledge from and through various media. Ultimately, by considering how more conventional approaches to studying social groups' relationships with and use of the Internet (as an interactive, global medium) and the social-political context that Internet use takes place within, a better understanding of media, youth and resistance, and cultural experience into the twenty-first century can be approached ("Music Education Research").

Communication

With a romantic relationship, there are several barriers to effective communication. The type of communication, group, organizational, individual, formal or informal will largely determine the potential for barriers. Each channel has unique challenges and requires a different level of competencies. However, the basic obstacles remain the same; setting expectations, identifying risk, avoidance, coercion, listening and trust are just a few of the barriers which the internet has overcame.

When communicating at any level, the expectation or outcomes should be identified in order to maximize the information being communicated. If participants in the information exchange are not clear on the senders' message, this can create avoidable barriers to the communication process. Outlining the outcomes will help to alleviate potential ambiguity.

Not only stating the objectives, but being flexible when needed to support group communication.

Passion is certainly the theme of Love Online. Ben-Ze'ev describes the development of intimate attachments of all types on the internet: from highly sexual to primarily emotional relationships, from friendships "tinged with sexual nuances" (245) to more superficial flirtations or one-night-stands. Because it is so easy and enticing to "meet" someone online, and because strong, intimate emotions can so easily develop, there has been a rise in cyber-infidelity, a phenomenon given much attention here. The book contains many accounts of online affairs from the participants' point-of-view, a la "He knows my deepest secrets and I know his. We are closer with each other than we are with our spouses" (173-173) and "It's like having your favorite erotic book come alive and tailored to you personally" (Ben-Ze'ev, 151).

Individuals who were less satisfied with their "real life" relationship would develop higher expectations of an affair. Researchers believe that couples facing dyadic conflicts seek support, intimacy, and understanding from other supports. Sexual satisfaction from the "real life" relationship plays a central role in the appeal… READ MORE

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